i just cannot see how i will be happy if we all live together. Those people with like, 4 German Shephards and a few cats too. So 4 years in we have 1 dog so neurotic i wimpers and is stuck to her heel the whole time shes home, it has to sleep under the bed she would have it on the bed if i didnt make a stand, it sits on her whenever she sits. I have two daughters, 13 & 11. Since then we have communicated about what it is that makes him upset1. Font make it an issue of choosing the dog over my mate. This can be the reason why your husband/boyfriend needs to get rid of the dog. Also, perhaps its not even necessarily your dog that he is annoyed by, but the way you are *treating* your dog. The only solution I have is 24/7 being in that chain. He admitted hed never told me he was frightened of them and thought it wouldnt be an issue, despite knowing how much I wanted a dog. Really his anger and frustration did not match the act. It almost feels like Im entering a relationship where I have to accept this dog as a step child! Obedience training. Me and my partner have been together for a year, I have a small dog (puggle) and he has a large dog (Rhodesian Ridgeback) its a rescue dog. Honestly, you do sound like one of those over-involved pet owners! Its not worth it. All our money is shared; the house is in his name, so are all the cars, and whenever I try to save some money aside in case I have to leave and take the dogs with me, he throws a tantrum and guilts me till I submit. Hello, again! Ive been understanding of this bc his mother had just passed. (He made the comment she would be happier there.) I hear quite a few self-righteous remarks and suggest to contemplate if your worries would really lessen if the dog is no longer I n the picture. Wow, sorry to hear that ANOTHER person put their dog above their human companion. So with all that said, Ive had lots of cats and dogs in my adult life, I just wasnt as you said a pet nut like my husband was with his dog and never will be. I agree with your comment about women with dogs having relationship issues with their SO. No, you dont have to see your boyfriends dog as a human. When she arrived she was on the couch. He was very controlling. They seem to outnumber the sane/rational ones! She had a 10 year old golden when we met and I bonded with both the girl and dog. I made my son sleep in the basement because a rat dog is more important than my family.. I did not want another dog. Idk what to do. I compromised on many things. My dog has been tempted time and time again by my Ex to jump in a car with him (while I had a restraining order against him) and not ONCE did she ever yield. My boyfriend of almost two years has a dog that follows him everywhere begs at our table to the point she is drooling and whining even though I say no. Its called triangulation, Sounds like your partner is a narcissist, please join a narcissist support group on Facebook and check for yourself. Meg- Omg! (He used to tell me on our early dates (together four years), that were dog oriented, how people looking at us giving glances were checking out his dog (not me). I didnt want it but I was new to the relationship and we didnt live together so it wasnt my place to say so. My bf told me soooo many times that he was trying to find a home for his dog & that once we bought a house the dog was not moving in no matter what. She says that wild be cruel to them. He wont listen to him and its making the situation worse! Thats over the line.but he refuses to act on it . Talking, begging, thumping tails, jumping around in excitement). Its all good in theory and they always say Well take care of them Well pick up the poop ya right, been there done that not doing it anymore. You are ripping away something that they are bonded to, a hobby that they like, a fun animal that they enjoy. I think the real issue is over the past 13 years my partner has had it one way and his way, and now that I request things be different he finds the demands unreasonable and defends his dog. Its all about compromising and some women cant get everything they want just like men. Itll be soooooooo much worse than it is now and youll wish you hadnt. Itll never work and itll be a fight every day of your life. I just wish he would be nice and not threaten to throw them out the door when Im not here. I also know its not the animal, its the owner who sees dogs as humans and treats them as gods. He even refers to her as his child. Each one was given boundaries and structure, taught manners in living with their humans, loved and spoiled with a lot of treats and toys. Hey Im in the same situation but my dog lives with me. He was even nice to my cat and the cat loved being on his lap. Recently, a neighbors dog broke into our yard and ripped one of my dogs up pretty badly; my spouse wouldnt let me take the dog to the vet for 3 days to see if her foreleg was broken or not, nor to stitch up the 3-in long, inch wide and half inch deep slash under one of her eyes. The dog just fed his ego. It would be one thing if he would actually take of it instead of just thinking it is a novelty and play toy. Just because he states its all shes known her whole life doesnt mean that she isnt supposed to learn. And most of them are not willing to put in the effort it takes to train, walk, and mentally stimulate them. My dog is a very important to me, and I feel like he just doesnt get it. I have the same with my husbands dogs. You deserve a man who will make you number one in his life! What has happened that this is happening? He just took her in and expected me to be on board. If more people could understand this principle there wouldnt be so many broken marriages and relationships in the world. Once the kids move out and get their own lives if they want tons and tons of pets thats great I can go visit their pets. I didnt want him on furniture which he has done and not in our room. This dog is seriously making my life hell. Its always there taking attention away from me. Ive been with my boyfriend for two years we currently live in a house with 6 animals 3 cats, a dog, and two rats. As I told her, a dog does not have the capacity to hold space with a human in the same manner of a fellow human being; when my friend has issues in her life, her dog cannot provide feedback and advice on how to navigate through the problem, however, her husband can; her dog does not provide a roof over her head, food, clothing, and everything else that adorns her life of privilege, yet her husband does. It takes some longer than others but you cannot let them run a mock and if he sets and KEEPS the boundaries without whining about it and accepts it wholeheartedly, then things can move forward. I was told by my friend today (he is a dog owner by the way), that he went with his wife to a restaurant in town and was eating on the patio. I told my bf that I dont want the dog in the bed with us. Im tired of being told wait till you have kids. He has 2 dogs. I know this. Any advice is highly appreciated! It has caused me a lot of stress. One time she pooped on my daughters bed near her pillow. He thinks it is his kid, and even takes it to daycare everyday. Hes been through tons of owners and they have all given up on him. My needs will never come before their craving to be with their pet. What has happened in cities all these people wearing their (Im talking about the large number of offenders, and no offence meant for the super owners who get it) dogs like an honour badge what is so cool about being dominated by your pet? Its so dumb splitting for an animal. Sadly since you have already brought it up to your partner and they dont respect you by compromising youre gonna be stuck and you should use this as a preview for what the rest of your relationship will look like. Shes the alpha over him. His bad habit is getting in the sink. On top of that he never got her trained or really house broke her completely and allowed her to sleep in the bed. Usually in the winter she stays in. Which is why it is so incredibly important that you treat your partner with the love and respect that they deserve. In 2015 she took a bullet for me in her flank when he pulled a gun on me while all of my Human. Relatives stood back in fear of their own lives. If someone wants to to change/abandon such a big part of your life it is a huge wake up call. I complete understand your point! I am through! My issue with my spouse and his dog is the dog, an animal, usurped me, given higher value, and more cherished than his wife. I wish you all the best and will be sendin prayers your way! Hate the smell of dog full stop. So recently I had a baby girl, and my husband has a 2 year old pit-bull. Eventually i was allowed in the bed, but the dogs keep jumping on and off from the bed and they shed hair EVERYWHERE. He would not survive the winter. My husband was on board and his only stipulation was that he wanted a dog that stayed small. They are always getting into the panty and eating us out of house and home, they poop and pee in the house still. Look the dog fanatics are crazed control freaks who cannot exist with ordinary people and use the dogs, who cannot talk back, to affirm their need for adoration and control. He can be bad, and I know that, but I dont know what to do anymore. As much as I love my cat it is literally the most annoying sound I have ever heard. This guy sounds ije a jerk. You need to train them. and my husband had never discouraged this. Depending on the dog, they dont live that long (smaller dogs live longer). Lady your dog is leading your life. It is protecting a member of its pack. I want to focus on our marriage and we want to travel together, I moved to the US for him, so we want to visit my home country regularly and also visit other places. My boyfriend adopted his dog at over a year old so has never dealt with a puppy, his dog completely disrespects me and wont listen to me at all. I have two Pitts, one I have had for 5 years, the other for 10 years. But, there are enough anecdotes, both here and buried in other articles, that show dog fanaticism like any fanaticism is unhealthy. Steadfast companions when asked, doing their own thing when we needed our space. I dont get to sleep with my boyfriend and I rarely get to cuddle him or get any love or attention from him because all he ever does is cuddles or hug or kiss the dog. Just because you want to be a furry freak, doesnt mean everyone else should applaud you for it. Dog stays off the furniture, gets her own doggie bed for the bedroom, and he sweeps everyday. Thanks. But as I sit here and read all the comments and the same scenarios I have been through, one thing does come to mind.communication. My SO has had this dog many years before me and my oldest came into the picture which I can understand but I can not understand this lack of control of this dog. I can sympathize with your situation and its too bad you are going through all this drama over the dogs. People are way too into saying put the pet above the human relationship and thats a bunch of B.S. It was my birthday gift. It made me realize that we will never be able to have another dog in the picture, which is terrible because I had been thinking about getting my own dog for a while now. Thank you all. You can enjoy animals without neglecting your partners wishes. Well that lasts for about a minute as well. I did not even respond to that stupid. I have problems with depression, chronic pain, etc. Currently I am attempting to see if my family would be willing to take them in. I vacuum three times a day or more. I hope those of you on here are able to come to some sort of resolution for your issues. The dog is to have free reign of his home, she was there for him first. I just begged for her to live and promised that even if she was permanently disabled , I would care for her kindly as long as she lived.For another 3-4 days she was still retarded. Dude Im in the same situation its been like this for idk how many months. Breaking up was a very wise decision on your part. Your family are people and they obviously know you better than your dog; your ex sounds lucky to be rid of you. im sorry youre going thru this.my situation is different..but i can totally relate to trying to train and work with a dog and having no one back you up or virtually undo anything you try to do with the dog to make progress..in your case it seems as if your ex is jealous of the bond you have with the puppy.the puppy is young it needs to have training i think yours doing a good thing for him and his dog. At the time I met my partner I had 6 rescue dogs. FYI, we are planning on living in an apartment :( Its just very stressful and need some advice I have been thinking about training, but i dont want that in our new house, because that will be pissed and ruined as soon as they are there, and I just want a clean house and not the additional stress of dogs around me. I guess hearing your story has helped me realise even more I need to end it. Therefore, you should go through its diet plan and create an appropriate diet plan with the assistance of a veterinarian. Shes isnt allowed on the couch or the bed, but when I left for 2 weeks for my baby shower he let her get on the bed and the couch and he would send me snapchats of it. Rebel I really feel for you. Its not that I purposefully treated the cat better, he was just more receiving and loving!! They come out there, put their mouth at the table because we have breakfast food on there and wipe drool on the table (throw up city!) But apparently it was too much to ask, because we have had so many massive fights about it. But I think if it wasntvtgepet in some if these stories it would be something else. If there is no compromise, there can be no relationship. She was used to having the dog in her bed, in the kitchen, on the couch. I cook for my dog, he opens a can. My God there are some idiots commenting on this thread. the dogs can sleep there and feel like theyre still in bed with me. Someone has said here in the comments that the cat is just a scapegoat for someone who is deeply disconnected. when the dog tried climbing on and continuously this weekend she told the dog off but she just keeps coming back. She never relieved herself in the house. Why do you want to violate someone elses free will? A partner does not need or rely upon you with its life. Lets not forget the constant pictures of the dog taken with her phonesmh, I dont think its cool that she disregarded your feelings about dog on bed after you told her how you felt. I started dating a girl and she had one bulldog. I have been seeing a man for almost 3 years now. I knew this dog was hurting. (I was sick of that too that I started putting my foot on her and saying, Thats enough. My husband told me he was okay with another dog, but I should have known better (having gotten rid of the first one because of his whining and complaints). A dog will stay with you out of need, a partner doesnt rely on you for their basic necessities. Im starting to feel resentment and dont know how to deal with this as I love the dog and hes well trained etc. A mean landlord had a cat that do anything to stop it isometric refuse lee took the cat to a different town an.d found a new home all in secret. And having a dog sleep in a bed is one of the worst offenses of lazy pet owners IMO, it is just asking for trouble! He is at home with her all day while I work. Chat with your veterinarian about spay or neuter the dog. How on earth was I supposed to know that someone was going to treat their dog like an infantile god-being? Reasons why does your husband/boyfriend wants to get rid of the dog? I could never get used to those gross drooly dogs but tried a relationship with a dog but it just doesnt work. I can live with that. Its embarrassing, humiliating, and I cant understand it at all. He yelled at me when I was tired and my feet where swollen because I didnt buy the dog food when she still had some left. It might be a little difficult for the dog at first to adjust, but that is what proper training is for. If you read my comment below you can see Im all about compromise and still do not agree with an animal in a human bed. This morning I got up and fed the crying baby, as I always do, while my husband sleeps. Life is about work and staying busy so I really feel Ive never had the time to get a dog or take time to care for one. Come on! You have to be prepared though. Not if you would have been watching him, the amount of money it has cost us because of his lack of training involvment has made me physically ill. HOW do I communicate to someone who LOVES their pet so much that they litterally and honestly feel the pets do no wrong???? All I want and preach to other people is compromise and Im still somewhere trying to find that. They must have hurt him because that is not how I raised him. I loved them, played with them, protected and cared for them, but they never usurped my relationship with a member of my family or a man. Hes also not allowed to beg for our food, and we dont feel the need to drag him everywhere we go. About a year ago he started asking me if we could get a dog, reluctantly I agreed on the condition that he takes full responsibility for it. There are many constraints you have passively aggressively imposed on your partner. Perhaps in many cases it is going to be easier to blame the pet than for him just to come right out and say that it is really you that is bugging him. When we started the relationship, it was big problems with his doga chihuahua. If you cant/wont, please take the time to find him a good home or take him to a rescue that will. He usually tells me, he cant disipline the THING because it can get sick and DIE.seriously? What Ive come to understand is that they dont really love dogs: they love that their friend unambiguously puts them at the top, that never talks back, never disagrees, that displays absolute loyalty no matter how awful the behavior. I am seeking advice about a present situation I have with my spouse about his dog. I have to tell him again and again because he just circles around. We have recently purchase a new home that has a 3 car garage. The worst part is, I cant hug or kiss her without this dog jumping between us and licking her face, which then totally turns me off! The only way I see to rectify the situation is to return the dog. Oh yes and car crazy will jump through windows to get in a car to make it stink, cover it in hair and rub its arse on a seat that I am meant to sit on. 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